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Synced and corrected by: Katniss Everdeen
www.addic7ed.com
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You gotta push it, Gary!
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Yeah, you heard him... push it, Gary!
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Hey, someone's pretty
studious about their gluteus.
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A-plus, Gary.
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So, Joan, what do you think of
my new Wasabi Warrior Academy?
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Whoo-whee!
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Fancy.
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But I gotta be honest with you,
still smells like your old dojo.
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You know, cat vomit, sweat and... Pickles.
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That's your sweater, Joan.
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(Chuckles)
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Excuse me, Rudy.
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I am a lady.
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And I think I would know if... (Gags)
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Nope, definitely your... (Gags) Dojo.
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You see, the Warrior Academy
has something for everybody.
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But my favorite are these resistance bands.
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They are a guaranteed way to get ripped.
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(Chuckles)
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Ohh! Yep! Something ripped.
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Hey, Jerry. I just got an e-mail
from Kim at the Otai academy in Japan.
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What's it say?
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(Speaking gibberish)
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Oh.
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"Congratulations on opening your new dojo.
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Love and miss you, Kim."
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Both: Aww.
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You know, I get Kim going to Otai.
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But why would Jack and Milton
sign up for summer school
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at the Biltmore Academy in Washington?
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Yeah, they're probably sitting
in some stuffy classroom right now
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just bored out of their skulls.
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(Dramatic music plays)
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Hey, Jack, what's your favorite part
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about working for the
government as an undercover spy?
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Uh, I'm gonna go with jetpacks.
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Whoo! Best summer ever!
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Gah!
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Jack, it happened again.
I'm gonna need a pickup.
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- (Rock music playing)
-
Don't you get all tough with me
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I'm saying won't you
come kick it with me?
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and we could have a
ball, run up the wall
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that's just how we do
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and no matter how
much I chop and punch
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it's not as cool as
kickin' it with you
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here we go, let's start the party
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chop it up like it's karate
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everybody
won't you
come kick it with me?
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and we could have a
ball, run up the wall
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that's just how we do
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and no matter how
much I chop and punch
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it's not as cool as
kickin' it with you.
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Well, gentlemen, that was our last mission.
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With Rash no longer a threat,
there's no need for our team.
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Yeah, so I guess you and
Milton can go back to Seaford,
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put on your pajamas and, uh, kick stuff.
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Excuse me.
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What Jack and I do in our
pajamas is our business.
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We do nothing in our pajamas.
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As a going-away gift, I want to
present you with these spy watches.
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If you push this button right here,
they become a high-powered magnet.
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Without an external energy source,
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it can't be that powerful.
- (Beeps)
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Oh! Yeah... no. It's pretty powerful.
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(Beeps)
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Where's my watch, sir?
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Ohh. Uh... I didn't get you watch, Shane.
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I got you...
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This pen!
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(Chuckles)
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They get cool watches, and I
just get this dumb polar bear pen?
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It's not just a pen.
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Look what happens to the polar
bear when you turn it upside-down.
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Oh, nice!
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He's wearing a bikini. (Laughs)
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Ooh-LA-LA.
Am I right?
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Yeah.
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Oh, yeah! It also has a laser.
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Forget the laser.
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This naughty bear is a riot.
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Guys, this is where we part ways.
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I just want to let you know that as
a military leader, I don't do emotion.
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It's a sign of weakness.
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It's best just to stay strong.
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It's just that... (Speaks gibberish)
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(Cries)
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Way to stay strong, sir.
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I can't even tell you how good it
is to have you two back in seaford.
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This place is amazing, but is there
any part of you that miss our old dojo?
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Boys, I want you to know that our
old dojo can never be replaced.
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We forged memories that
are gonna last a lifetime.
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I even had my first kiss there.
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Weren't you 27 when that place opened?
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(Murmurs)
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Did I say first? I meant like 100th.
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So how'd you get the money for this place?
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I've always said you can achieve anything
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with hard work, discipline
and self sacrifice.
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So what did you do?
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I went in on a lottery ticket with Phil.
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Okay.
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We need three matching animals
to win a million dollars.
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- Panda.
- Oh, nice.
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Panda!
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(Both screaming)
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We won! It's a panda?!
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No, it's a monkey. But
Phil loves the monkeys
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- (laughing)
- (Metal clangs)
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Oh, look what fell out.
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What?
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That's the bolt that's
holding the safety bar in.
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Oh, you mean...
- oh! Uh-oh! - Aah!
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- Oh, we're moving!
- Aah!
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(Both screaming)
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The Ferris wheel company paid us a
lot of money so we wouldn't sue 'em.
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I used my money to open up this
place, and Phil used his to open up
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the business of his dreams.
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It's not food poisoning, it's bowling fever
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(Bell dings)
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(Sniffs) Ugh.
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What's up, dude?
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What?! Guys, you're back!
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- Here we are!
- Oh-ho!
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Wow, this place is awesome.
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Jerry! What's up, dude?
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What?! Dude!
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No way! We missed you guys.
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Yo, you're not gonna believe it.
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I'm the new manager here.
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(Both Chuck)
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What do you know about
managing a bowling alley?
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Oh, a lot. In fact, I increased profit
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by coming up with a way for
people to play more games per hour.
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How'd you do that?
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I sped up the ball returns.
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(Ball whooshes)
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That's just good managing, yo.
139
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Well.
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You guys enjoy yourselves.
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I gotta get back to work. (Clicks tongue)
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- (Phone beeping)
- Hey, Jack, I just got a text
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from Funderburk to call him.
144
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We just got back. Don't respond.
145
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I'm tired of teaching
him to program his d.V.R.
146
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To record "Dog Show Divas."
147
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He says it's an emergency.
148
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Let's go.
149
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Kickin' it with you!
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Hoo-ooo!
151
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Aw, Phil, I honestly
love working here, man.
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This place has really got it going on.
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Oh, and the going on is
really going, bro-chacho.
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My bowling alley is the
coolest place in town.
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And it will stay that way forever.
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(Rock music playing)
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(Music stops)
158
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Listen up, everybody!
159
00:08:10,670 --> 00:08:14,256
I'm the pinhead and this is splits Malone.
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Alley cats in the house, people!
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(Meows, hisses)
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(Meows fiercely)
163
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No.
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Whoa whoa whoa.
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Jerry: Cool people, where you going?
166
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Come back, my bro-chachos!
167
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My bro-chachos!
168
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I need your help.
169
00:08:36,562 --> 00:08:38,430
There was one Rash agent
we didn't know about.
170
00:08:38,464 --> 00:08:40,398
And he's recruiting new people.
171
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The jet-copter's on
the way to pick you up.
172
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By the way, did you see
"dog show divas" last night?
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There was a chihuahua... aah!
174
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Let's go up to the roof
and wait for the jet-copter.
175
00:08:51,344 --> 00:08:52,510
Let's go.
176
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(Door opens, closes)
177
00:08:56,282 --> 00:08:57,549
That was the mop closet.
178
00:08:57,551 --> 00:08:59,301
To the roof! Let's go!
179
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(High-pitched scream).
180
00:09:00,353 --> 00:09:01,620
Aah!
181
00:09:01,654 --> 00:09:03,254
That was the ladies' room.
182
00:09:03,272 --> 00:09:05,156
Yeah, we really gotta learn
our way around this place
183
00:09:05,191 --> 00:09:06,424
when we get back.
- Yeah.
184
00:09:06,459 --> 00:09:07,492
Kickin' it with you!
185
00:09:11,694 --> 00:09:13,361
(Elevator dings)
186
00:09:13,395 --> 00:09:15,697
(Both grunting)
187
00:09:17,500 --> 00:09:18,700
Milton!
188
00:09:18,734 --> 00:09:20,368
You're fighting a ficus!
189
00:09:20,402 --> 00:09:21,753
You sure?
190
00:09:21,787 --> 00:09:25,707
There are some really good disguises
out there... yep, no, it's a ficus.
191
00:09:28,344 --> 00:09:29,577
Jack, Milton. I'm glad you made it.
192
00:09:29,595 --> 00:09:31,379
Shane, where's Funderburk?
193
00:09:31,413 --> 00:09:32,580
He was captured by Rash.
194
00:09:32,598 --> 00:09:34,549
There was one agent we didn't know about.
195
00:09:34,583 --> 00:09:37,318
Someone so secretive and so smart,
196
00:09:37,353 --> 00:09:40,388
he was able to fool everyone
by pretending to be one of us.
197
00:09:40,422 --> 00:09:42,390
A double agent.
198
00:09:42,424 --> 00:09:43,591
I'll bet it was Donovan.
199
00:09:43,609 --> 00:09:45,360
It wasn't Donovan.
200
00:09:45,394 --> 00:09:46,761
You know who it was? Kowalski!
201
00:09:46,796 --> 00:09:49,447
Oh, I can so see that. Classic Kowalski!
202
00:09:49,482 --> 00:09:50,565
It wasn't Kowalski.
203
00:09:50,599 --> 00:09:52,484
Got it! Judith from reception.
204
00:09:53,702 --> 00:09:55,503
You never knew which way the
wind was blowing with her.
205
00:09:55,538 --> 00:09:57,772
Don't I know it! Talk about a moody Judy.
206
00:09:57,840 --> 00:09:58,773
Crazy!
207
00:09:58,808 --> 00:10:00,608
It wasn't Judith!
208
00:10:00,643 --> 00:10:01,643
It was me.
209
00:10:02,778 --> 00:10:03,745
What?
210
00:10:03,779 --> 00:10:05,547
Jack and Milton: No no...
211
00:10:07,449 --> 00:10:08,449
What?
212
00:10:08,467 --> 00:10:11,553
None of you will ever
leave this place alive.
213
00:10:11,587 --> 00:10:13,471
Shane, why are you doing this?
214
00:10:13,506 --> 00:10:15,590
So you can finally see I'm better than you.
215
00:10:15,624 --> 00:10:17,492
I'm so sick and tired of everyone thinking
216
00:10:17,526 --> 00:10:19,561
you and Milton are the
world's greatest spies.
217
00:10:19,595 --> 00:10:20,562
Pfft!
218
00:10:21,764 --> 00:10:22,797
Great.
219
00:10:22,832 --> 00:10:27,402
So I'm free to go then, or... Nope.
220
00:10:27,436 --> 00:10:28,636
You're not going anywhere.
221
00:10:28,671 --> 00:10:29,637
Lock 'em up.
222
00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:44,519
St... rike!
223
00:10:46,789 --> 00:10:49,490
Hey, Phil, I need to turn this fan up.
224
00:10:49,508 --> 00:10:50,825
Mama don't roll with swamp foot.
225
00:10:50,860 --> 00:10:52,794
(Fan whirring)
226
00:10:52,828 --> 00:10:55,630
Man, that's disgusting.
227
00:10:55,664 --> 00:10:57,465
You think that's disgusting?
228
00:10:57,499 --> 00:10:58,833
Look at what she's drying now.
229
00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:08,610
Look, you guys are driving
away all our customers.
230
00:11:08,644 --> 00:11:10,511
I'm gonna have to ask you both to leave.
231
00:11:10,529 --> 00:11:11,713
(Exhales)
232
00:11:11,747 --> 00:11:13,781
There's only one way
you're gonna get rid of us.
233
00:11:13,816 --> 00:11:17,585
Just find someone who
can out bowl the pinhead.
234
00:11:17,620 --> 00:11:19,821
Fine.
235
00:11:19,855 --> 00:11:21,522
I'll do it.
236
00:11:21,557 --> 00:11:22,740
Here's how it's gonna work.
237
00:11:22,791 --> 00:11:24,742
You versus me, one game.
238
00:11:24,793 --> 00:11:27,361
I win, you go. You win, you stay.
239
00:11:27,379 --> 00:11:28,413
We tie, one more game.
240
00:11:28,464 --> 00:11:29,631
I win, you go.
241
00:11:29,665 --> 00:11:32,700
You win, you stay. We tie again...
Joan, Rudy and Phil: We get it!
242
00:11:35,671 --> 00:11:37,472
I'm taking everything.
243
00:11:37,506 --> 00:11:40,425
Encryption codes, top-secret hard drives.
244
00:11:40,476 --> 00:11:43,711
Even Funderburk's angel's kiss toilet paper.
245
00:11:43,729 --> 00:11:44,812
That's my last roll.
246
00:11:47,516 --> 00:11:49,717
Oh. You animal.
247
00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:53,721
And I gave you a really
sweet polar bear bikini pen!
248
00:11:53,739 --> 00:11:54,822
Yeah. Which broke!
249
00:11:54,857 --> 00:11:56,791
After the first few hundred flips.
250
00:11:58,894 --> 00:12:00,662
As soon as we're done loading up,
251
00:12:00,696 --> 00:12:03,831
I'm going to hit the self-destruct
button, and it's good-bye, losers.
252
00:12:05,401 --> 00:12:06,701
Oh, hold up.
253
00:12:06,735 --> 00:12:09,754
I have to go... Do some spy stuff.
254
00:12:15,544 --> 00:12:17,712
Once he hits that button,
there's no way to deactivate it.
255
00:12:17,746 --> 00:12:20,715
If we got that pen, we could
use the laser to cut the lock.
256
00:12:22,418 --> 00:12:23,818
We can get the pen by
using the magnet watch
257
00:12:23,852 --> 00:12:25,687
to bring over the metal garbage can.
258
00:12:25,721 --> 00:12:28,423
No, too complicated. I say we get
the pen by using the magnet watch
259
00:12:28,457 --> 00:12:29,724
to bring over the metal garbage can.
260
00:12:29,758 --> 00:12:31,659
That's what I just said.
261
00:12:31,694 --> 00:12:34,595
Now is not the time to be
taking credit for my ideas.
262
00:12:34,630 --> 00:12:36,464
Can we just do this, please?
263
00:12:38,450 --> 00:12:40,435
- If I aim it just right...
- (Watch beeps)
264
00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:41,436
I can...
265
00:12:43,772 --> 00:12:45,740
Good job.
- Wait, I got it.
266
00:12:45,774 --> 00:12:47,542
- Hurry.
- Okay.
267
00:12:48,711 --> 00:12:51,412
- Got it!
- Okay.
268
00:12:51,446 --> 00:12:52,463
(Exhales)
269
00:12:52,498 --> 00:12:54,615
Ow.
270
00:12:54,650 --> 00:12:55,833
Do you have a metal plate in your head?
271
00:12:55,884 --> 00:12:56,851
No.
272
00:12:56,885 --> 00:12:58,753
Maybe. Why? What have you heard?
273
00:13:01,890 --> 00:13:04,425
Here we go, let's start the party
274
00:13:04,459 --> 00:13:06,477
chop it up like it's karate.
275
00:13:06,512 --> 00:13:10,498
If Jerry doesn't show up by
2:00, it's an automatic forfeit.
276
00:13:10,532 --> 00:13:12,517
And we get to bowl here forever.
277
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:17,405
Nobody messes with the pinhead.
278
00:13:17,439 --> 00:13:18,573
(Laughing)
279
00:13:18,607 --> 00:13:19,741
Pinhead.
280
00:13:21,694 --> 00:13:23,661
(Mariachi music plays)
281
00:13:50,406 --> 00:13:52,407
- I'm surprised you showed up, Jerry.
- (Music stops)
282
00:13:52,441 --> 00:13:53,674
(Latin accent) It's not Jerry.
283
00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:56,728
It's... (Acoustic guitar riff plays)
284
00:13:56,779 --> 00:13:58,479
"The Jerry."
285
00:13:59,748 --> 00:14:02,583
It's weird because you look
a lot like my friend Jerry.
286
00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:07,321
Do you think that you
can beat... "The Rudy"?
287
00:14:10,359 --> 00:14:11,492
Ball!
288
00:14:32,381 --> 00:14:34,382
Ho-ho-ho! - (
Mariachi music plays)
289
00:14:42,408 --> 00:14:43,591
(Electric guitar riff plays)
290
00:14:47,496 --> 00:14:48,696
- (Rock music plays)
- (Light applause)
291
00:14:51,667 --> 00:14:54,769
(Mariachi riff playing over rock music)
292
00:15:00,609 --> 00:15:02,543
(Cheering)
293
00:15:16,725 --> 00:15:18,693
(Stomps foot)
294
00:15:28,570 --> 00:15:30,404
(Crowd murmurs)
295
00:15:32,674 --> 00:15:35,376
He's only got one roll left.
296
00:15:35,410 --> 00:15:37,378
And the only way he can
win it is if he makes
297
00:15:37,412 --> 00:15:39,380
the impossible seven-10 split.
298
00:15:39,414 --> 00:15:41,382
He'll never make it!
299
00:15:42,751 --> 00:15:44,719
We're going to lose.
300
00:15:44,753 --> 00:15:46,454
My life is ruined.
301
00:15:46,488 --> 00:15:47,788
My businesis ruined.
302
00:15:47,823 --> 00:15:51,809
All of my dreams are... shh shh shh shh.
303
00:15:51,844 --> 00:15:55,830
(Latin ceacnt) Have
faith in... The Jerry.
304
00:16:24,793 --> 00:16:26,594
(Both laugh)
305
00:16:26,628 --> 00:16:28,596
We lost!
306
00:16:28,630 --> 00:16:29,764
Did we?
307
00:16:29,798 --> 00:16:31,766
(Flamenco music plays)
308
00:16:33,402 --> 00:16:35,336
(Blows)
309
00:16:37,556 --> 00:16:39,607
He did it! He did it!
310
00:16:39,641 --> 00:16:41,542
He did it!
311
00:16:41,577 --> 00:16:43,578
(Cheering)
312
00:16:43,612 --> 00:16:46,447
Never doubt the Jerry.
313
00:16:46,481 --> 00:16:48,616
We lost, pinhead.
314
00:16:48,650 --> 00:16:53,571
We lost, but... We lost to a legend.
315
00:16:53,622 --> 00:16:55,590
(Flamenco music pla)
316
00:17:02,431 --> 00:17:03,548
See ya, pinhead.
317
00:17:08,503 --> 00:17:10,504
(Drilling)
318
00:17:13,759 --> 00:17:15,743
So I said, "your beard
makes you look thinner."
319
00:17:15,777 --> 00:17:17,345
That seemed to cheer her right up.
320
00:17:19,714 --> 00:17:21,382
(Drilling) -
Say good-bye, Jack!
321
00:17:23,385 --> 00:17:25,686
20 seconds after I push
this self-destruct button,
322
00:17:25,721 --> 00:17:28,522
you three are going to be a memory.
323
00:17:28,557 --> 00:17:30,391
(Beeping)
324
00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:32,693
Woman's voice: Your baked potato
will be ready in 20 seconds.
325
00:17:32,728 --> 00:17:34,428
(Laughing)
326
00:17:34,463 --> 00:17:36,430
That's the microwave button.
327
00:17:36,465 --> 00:17:37,465
(Mouths)
328
00:17:37,499 --> 00:17:39,700
The self-destruct button is the brown one.
329
00:17:39,735 --> 00:17:40,701
Funderburk!
330
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:45,473
Woman's voice:
Self-destruction in 30 seconds.
331
00:17:45,507 --> 00:17:47,408
- Got it!
- (Alarm blaring)
332
00:17:48,460 --> 00:17:49,443
I got this.
333
00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:56,517
(Grunting)
334
00:18:22,577 --> 00:18:23,711
Woman's voice: Your baked potato is done.
335
00:18:25,464 --> 00:18:27,614
Self-destruction in 10 seconds.
336
00:18:27,633 --> 00:18:29,450
Guys, the tunnel's the only way out.
337
00:18:39,494 --> 00:18:41,629
No spud left behind!
338
00:18:50,522 --> 00:18:53,574
Hot hot hot hot hot!
339
00:18:53,608 --> 00:18:54,775
Jack, we gotta get out of here.
340
00:19:11,593 --> 00:19:13,544
Come on. Let's go.
341
00:19:13,595 --> 00:19:15,379
Why are you saving me, Jack?
342
00:19:15,430 --> 00:19:16,764
Because it's the right thing to do.
343
00:19:16,798 --> 00:19:20,634
Three, two... One.
344
00:19:29,544 --> 00:19:32,346
Thanks to you, Shane and
his men have been captured.
345
00:19:32,364 --> 00:19:34,565
I can never repay you guys
for coming back and saving me.
346
00:19:34,616 --> 00:19:36,450
Aw, you don't have to repay us.
347
00:19:36,485 --> 00:19:37,618
We did it because we're friends.
348
00:19:37,652 --> 00:19:39,520
And you would have done
the same thing for us.
349
00:19:39,554 --> 00:19:43,557
Uh... (Exhales)
350
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,660
Sure. (Chuckles)
351
00:19:47,729 --> 00:19:51,716
Anyway, looks like our spy days are over.
352
00:19:54,702 --> 00:19:55,753
Hey, funderburk.
353
00:19:57,723 --> 00:19:59,573
I saved this for you.
354
00:19:59,608 --> 00:20:02,376
My angel's kiss!
355
00:20:03,678 --> 00:20:06,647
Perfect timing. I gotta
go take care of some...
356
00:20:07,816 --> 00:20:09,750
Spy stuff.
357
00:20:11,820 --> 00:20:15,423
Hey, I'm, uh, getting
pretty high up on this wall.
358
00:20:15,457 --> 00:20:16,490
You sure you got me?
359
00:20:16,525 --> 00:20:18,442
I said I got you, Rudy. Keep going.
360
00:20:18,493 --> 00:20:19,593
All right.
361
00:20:19,628 --> 00:20:20,594
(Coughs)
362
00:20:20,629 --> 00:20:24,799
I got a feeling... A feeling for ceiling!
363
00:20:24,833 --> 00:20:28,786
You know, Milton, I'm glad to
be back, but so much has changed.
364
00:20:28,837 --> 00:20:30,604
I wonder if it'll ever feel like home.
365
00:20:35,794 --> 00:20:38,412
(Both screaming)
366
00:20:38,430 --> 00:20:39,746
You said you had me!
367
00:20:39,765 --> 00:20:40,848
I did have you!
368
00:20:40,882 --> 00:20:42,616
As long as you didn't fall.
369
00:20:42,651 --> 00:20:43,651
That's it!
370
00:20:43,685 --> 00:20:45,586
Ow! Ow!
371
00:20:45,604 --> 00:20:47,755
Yeah, this is more like home.
372
00:20:47,789 --> 00:20:49,657
Aah!
373
00:20:49,691 --> 00:20:51,609
- Should we?
- Absolutely.
374
00:20:51,643 --> 00:20:53,561
Let's go bowling.
375
00:20:53,595 --> 00:20:54,728
Kickin' it with you!
376
00:21:00,374 --> 00:21:03,076
I'm a pretty good bowler, huh, Jack?
377
00:21:03,110 --> 00:21:04,410
I almost beat you that second game.
378
00:21:04,444 --> 00:21:08,131
Yeah, you really found your
stride once you put the bumpers up.
379
00:21:09,333 --> 00:21:12,051
Ah, dude, I think I left
my spy watch in the dojo.
380
00:21:16,173 --> 00:21:18,424
Yo, guys, check out
this sick watch I found.
381
00:21:18,459 --> 00:21:20,260
Yeah, I don't know what this button does.
382
00:21:20,294 --> 00:21:22,095
No no no, Jerry! Don't
press that. (Beeps)
383
00:21:28,152 --> 00:21:30,136
Do you have a metal plate in your head?
384
00:21:30,171 --> 00:21:34,107
No... Maybe. Why? What have you heard?
385
00:21:34,157 --> 00:21:38,707
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